Shady's Back...Tell a Friend!

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Efficient? Yes. Stupid? Also Yes.

A German man was in line for a plane home from Egypt when security told him that he would have to dump out the liter of vodka he was carrying or pay to have his carry-on bag checked thanks to the airline liquid ban. Instead, the man chose option C. He drank the entire liter. Then he went to the hospital to be treated for alcohol poisoning.

See, to me, that is incredibly efficient. He bought the vodka, so he drank the vodka. The fact that it was enough vodka to KO Lindsay Lohan (or an elephant), yeah maybe that wasn't the best part of the plan.


Thursday, December 06, 2007

Romney to America: Mormon Shmorman!

Today Mitt Romney said that, "A person should not be elected because of his faith, nor should he be rejected because of his faith"

Sounds good. Sounds like Mitt feels that religions shouldn't be a litmus test for presidential office. Go Mitt Go!

But wait just a second. A short while ago Romney was asked if he'd be willing to appoint a Muslim to his cabinet if elected. His response:
" . . . based on the numbers of American Muslims [as a percentage of] our population, I cannot see that a Cabinet position would be justified. But of course, I would imagine that Muslims could serve at lower levels of my administration."

So religion shouldn't be a litmus test for president but it should for cabinet positions. Makes perfect sense to me Mitt.

Also, not to get hung up on a technicality but Muslims claim 7 million adherents in the U.S. compared to the 5.5 million adherents claimed by LDS.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

A Tara-bly AWESOME Idea for What You Can Get ME!

If you have been sitting around wondering just what to get me as a housewarming gift, here's an idea...Tara Reid! She had been pedaling her appearance in Australia for $30K, but when there were no takers, she dropped the asking price to a mere $3,500. That is downright CHEAP.

I'm not sure if anyone reads this blog, but if they do, and there are like a thousand of you out there, you could get me Tara Reid for only $3.50 each. That is one less Happy Meal for you and a lifetime of happy memories for me.

Think it over. Having Tara Reid come to my housewarming party would be so amazing that this blog would probably explode because there is absolutely nothing that could happen on earth that would top that. I would never again have anything to write about. Yes, this could work.


Monday, December 03, 2007

Fool Me Once...Shame on You...Fool Me Eight Times...uh...You Can't Get Fooled Again

Everybody's favorite Toe-Tappin' Senator, Larry Craig, remains under the hot lights about his alleged affairs or attempts at affairs with men who are not his wife. Craig's hometown paper now claims to have accounts from 8 men stating that they either had sex with Craig or were propositioned for sex by Craig.

First off, I can't believe we are still talking about this. Larry Craig should have pulled a Ted Haggard, headed to Gay Rehab, and then had a church board declare him heterosexual (or cured). Instead, he keeps denying it which angers the people who he did it with, which makes them come forward because even men who get paid for sex have enough dignity to hate being called liars. Let's be honest folks, could there possibly be 8 men in this world who hate Larry Craig enough to lie about having sex with him? If they didn't have sex with him, they are only punishing themselves by claiming that they did.

When will the Larry Craigs of the world learn that if you are going to are going to have an affair that will ruin your career, have it with somebody who has as much to lose as you do. For instance Larry Craig and Ted Haggard could have had a rather lovely romance, but no...instead they both called the same male prostitute who in turn ratted them both out. These are the people we have running our nation? Where is their sense of patriotism? If you are going to be in government, you either have to be able to tell the truth and deal with the consequences (HA!) or able to successfully execute a cover-up...Larry Craig can do neither and that alone is reason enough to kick him back to Idaho.

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