Shady's Back...Tell a Friend!

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Aren't You Overreacting, Just a Tad?

A Russian man accidentally blew himself up with a hand grenade after train conductors asked to see his ticket. The conductors thought the man, who appeared intoxicated, had a grenade and asked him to show his paperwork or get off the train at the next stop. The man showed the conductors the grenade and demanded that the train go to the city of Vladivostok instead of its planned destination of the city of Chelyabinsk. At this point, the other train passengers were evacuated. Negotiations with the man were going well until the man tried to replace the pin that he had removed from the grenade. The grenade (not shockingly) detonated, killing the man but injuring no one else.

He blew himself up because the conductor asked to see his train ticket and he believed he could hijack a train with a single grenade. Is there a website that stupid people and people who are prone to overreaction can go to purchase things to blow themselves up? How do idiots manage to so easily get their hands on explosives when intelligent people like myself can't get our hands on explosives to say...blow up some ground bees that have invaded our back yard? They say everybody is good at something, apparently the less bright are better at procuring weapons.

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Monday, November 26, 2007

Singapore Rocks On

Singapore's Media Development Authority wants you to know they have big plans for Singapore on the world media stage. It is pretty awesome that they took time out of their busy foreign media censoring schedule to rap about how much they love a free exchange of ideas and information.

Monday, November 19, 2007

Justice Department Gets New Employee

The U.S. Attorney for Minnesota is leaving her post to take a job with the Justice Department right here in our Nation's Capital. Rachel Paulose leaves her post amid a swirl of allegations that she mishandled confidential information and used racial slurs about an employee.

Racial slurs and an inability to handle confidential information? She will fit right in at the Justice Department.

Welcome to Washington Rachel!

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Did India Legalize Gay Marriage?

I ask because last week, P. Selvakumar of Southern India married a dog. Selvakumar decided to propose in an effort to atone for the fact that 15 years ago he stoned 2 different dogs to death. He said that his life has been cursed ever since and he decided that the best thing to do was to make a dog his wife. So far no word on if his life has improved since the wedding.

I'm pretty sure that this type of thing only follows the legalization of Gay Marriage so congrats to all the Gays in India as well!

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Monday, November 12, 2007

Must Be the Provigil

There is a rumor circulating that Britney Spears failed one of the 6 out of 14 drug tests that she has bothered to show up for. Team Britney claims that the failure was due in part to the presence of the prescription drug Provigil that Britney takes to control her Narcolepsy.

Time out...Britney Spears is Narcoleptic? Notice that her lawyer didn't mention her narcolepsy when trying to explain why Britney can't manage to make it out of bed to go to her drug tests:

“The idea that she needs to respond within the hour is meaningless. Is the issue that Britney Spears needs to get up at 8.30am and answer the phone? She's a pop star with a number one album. She is not up that early."

Did Britney Spears find her lawyer at A.) the back-up dancer unemployment office or B.) an Arby's?

Vote in the comments section!

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Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Fun, Delicious, Deadly

Yet another toy manufactured in China has been pulled from the shelves. This time it was "Aqua Dots" bead kits. When ingested, the coating on the dots converts into a "date rape" drug that has already put several children in the hospital.

What is the world coming to that kids can't even swallow their toys without fear of ending up hospitalized? The good news is that I finally have an explanation for why that creepy guy at the bar kept offering to buy me a "cup of plastic beads".

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Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Delicious Donkey

A Beijing, China donkey meat shop is in trouble for using a live donkey for promotional purposes. The donkey mascot is left on local street corners alone, often for hours at a time, wearing a coat that displays an ad for his owners. Locals are appalled by the treatment of the donkey, but the owner of the donkey meat shop insists there is no harm done and that serves his purpose to bring in more customers.

If I had a donkey meat shop, I would definitely use a live donkey as a billboard. This would allow people to see the quality of my product and entice them to my establishment. How else would people know that the donkey meat at my shop is better than the donkey meat offered at my neighbor's donkey meat shop? Jeez. You crazy animal activists.

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Thursday, November 01, 2007

A Republican Rides the Stallion!

Another one bites the dust!

Have you heard the story about the anti-gay right winger who ended up being a flaming homo?

No, not Larry Craig.

No, not Ted Haggard.

No, not Mark Foley.

No, not Bob Allen.

There's a new one. Washington State Representative Richard Curtis has found himself in the center of a gay sex/extortion "problem".

The SeattleTimes reports: But from the start of Curtis' trouble — when he awoke in Spokane's fanciest hotel after a night of sex with a man known in some circles as "Stallion" who said he had left with Curtis' wallet and explicit photos of the legislator — he was hoping to control the damage to his reputation and his marriage. Curtis didn't call the Spokane cops. Instead, he called a friend in the Washington State Patrol on the other side of the mountains because, a police report says, he worried "the local police would talk and it would get out to the press."

(for those not familiar with "stallion" that's him up top, on the right!!! HOTTIE!)

This newest anti-gay gay just makes the following cartoon all the more funny....and true (click on picture to enlarge).

credit for the cartoon goes to
By the way, it's entirely possible I missed an anti-gay gay, feel free to add.

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