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Tuesday, September 26, 2006

The Hoff in Hot Water…And Not the Good Kind Found in Jacuzzis

The Hoff is in trouble and I don’t know what to think about it. My natural inclination would be to help The Hoff because he is awesome, but he really has gotten himself into a doozey of a pickle this time. The Hoff called police to report that his daughter (The Hoff Jr., who is under the care of estranged wife of The Hoff) had “cut” herself in an apparent suicide attempt. Rumors are now surfacing that The Hoff Jr. didn’t cut herself, rather she was scratched by the family cat and The Hoff just called the police so they would go and bother estranged wife of The Hoff. Reportedly, The Hoff made the call to police and then promptly boarded a plane to a film festival without seeing The Hoff Jr.

The most interesting part of this story is that estranged wife of The Hoff says that when she called The Hoff to tell him about The Hoff Jr. being cut by the family cat, The Hoff Jr. was crying uncontrollably and estranged wife of The Hoff suggested that maybe they should take The Hoff Jr. to see a psychologist the next day…over a cat scratch?

Unlike The Hoff’s incredible popularity in
Germany (which is completely logical and reasonable) this story doesn’t add up. We should all write to our Senators and Congress persons to get The Hoff’s name cleared!*

*No charges or anything have been filed but an assault on the character of The Hoff is an assault on America.

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6 Comments:

Anonymous Bucket said...

I looooooove that your blog is slowly turning from political satire to celebrity gossip. This only goes to show that I have extreme power over everything that you do! I'm like your dictator! Let's hope our country doesn't try to 'democratize' our relationship, because that would only yield less celebrity gossip for all.

11:50 AM

 
Blogger scooterlulu said...

Not necessarily true Bucket. Just becuase things happened recently with several of our favorite celebrities (Whacko Jacko, Aaron Carter, Justin Timberlake, & The Hoff) does necessarily mean that we are strictly writing about celebrity gossip. In fact, it just means that soon there will be a string of political and human interest stories coming down the pipe. Sorry to disappoint!

12:12 PM

 
Blogger (A Little) Gris Gris said...

I knew this Hoff episode would make the GTB! I was thinking about it just this morning as I was making the grueling morning commute amongst all the road ragin' Miamians.

Lulu - I've been giving you such good political nonsensical crap. Why you no post? I am wondering if you really are Bucket's puppet - despite your protestations.

Okay. Off to lunch.

12:28 PM

 
Blogger scooterlulu said...

This is true. Gris Gris you do feed me good tips. The honest truth is that Politcal Posts take significantly longer to research and write. So sometimes, you'll have to put up with the fluff. Keep the tips coming though! We will get to them eventually!

12:38 PM

 
Blogger (A Little) Gris Gris said...

I see you in bucket's pocket! But, there's always hope that you'll jump into mine.

2:11 PM

 
Anonymous Reebs said...

Please, Congress is far too busy debating things like the "Protection of Public Expressions of Religion Act" to bother with clearing the Hoff's good name! He's on his own!

2:44 PM

 

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